Spooge's Spit Up - The Anti-Energy Drink

There are plenty of strange products out there, and they all need a publicist. This morning, I got in to the office and was greeted by a message from a sleepy- sounding woman calling about Drank "the anti-energy drink we're calling the extreme relaxation beverage."

Isn't that already covered by a little thing called wine? No? This was too good to pass up, so I gave a call back.

Turns out, this is a carbonated, grape-flavored beverage spiked with melatonin, valerian root and rose hips. Apparently it is "very, very popular in Houston," and it's sold throughout the south in liquor and convenience stores.

So, does it make you sleepy? I asked the publicist. Yes, and she hears it's good with vodka. Oh, something that makes it more likely I'll fall asleep while drinking? Excellent.

What, you might wonder, was the creator thinking? I'm glad you asked. He was thinking of the hip hop community. Direct from the press release:

"From design to production, every aspect of this calming drink was inspired by today’s popular hip hop artists who embrace the much sought-after hip hop lifestyle that encourages people to capture a stress-free state of mind."

The drink's tagline is "slow your roll." So if that's something you need to do, keep your eye out. Drank will be hitting stores in New York soon.