What the Job Ad Says and What It Actually Means - Part II


Outstanding benefits package
-Health insurance


Tons of variety

-We took all of the heinous tasks no one else would do and rolled them into one job


Top notch communication skills

-Telemarketing


Beautiful offices in attractive locale

-Brand new tacky windowless office where picture frames match the carpet


Secretary

-Woman only job with the responsibilities of management and the wages of a migrant worker


Executive secretary

-The most powerful position in any company


Dedicated

-You're looking at a minimum of 80 hours a week until we force you into early retirement


Salary commensurate

-We'll pay you whatever the we feel like


Salary negotiable

-We'll take the lowest bidder


Competitive salary

-We'll pay you up to 10 percent more than your last job!


Competitive starting salary

-Ten cents above minimum wage


Pleasant atmosphere

-A staff of pod people


Professional atmosphere

-Zombie pod people


Self-starter

-Open to very broad interpretation, since no one really knows what this means

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