Thats What They Said....


"I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five." - Steven Wright

"I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name." - Paula Poundstone


"I intend to live forever. So far, so good." - Steven Wright


"I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member." - Groucho Marx


"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." - Groucho Marx


"If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor." - Joan Rivers


"If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?" - Lily Tomlin


"My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic." - Spike Milligan

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