Reasons You Should Buy a New Car

- Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

- Instead of an air bag, there is a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

- You lose the stoplight challenge to a 14 year old on a moped.

- 15 minute Jiffy Lube needs to keep you car for 3 days.

- When you gas up, the attendant asks, "Can I re-duct tape that windshield for you?"

- Thieves repeatedly break in your car just to steal the "Club".

- While sitting at a stop light, people keep running up to you and asking if anyone was hurt.

- For the last five years, you've had to settle for making "vroom, vroom' noises while in the driveway.

- You keep losing dates on left turns.

Digg It! Stumble Delicious Technorati Tweet It! Facebook Add To Reddit RSS Google Bookmarks Meneame