Makes You Think

 
When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and  when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered  side facing down.  I propose to strap buttered toast to the  back of a cat; the two will hover, spinning inches above  the ground.  With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed  monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.


 If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number  of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds  at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually  produce all the worlds great literary works in Braille.

 Why Yawning Is Contagious:  You yawn to  equalize the  pressure on your eardrums.  This  pressure change outside  your eardrums unbalances  other people's ear pressures, so  they must yawn to even it out.

 Communist China is technologically underdeveloped  because they have no alphabet and  therefore cannot use  acronyms to communicate ideas at a faster rate.

 The earth may spin faster on its axis due to  deforestation.  Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the  arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall  trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.


 Birds take off at sunrise.  On the opposite side of the  world, they are landing at sunset.  This causes the earth to  spin on its axis.

 The reason hot-rod owners raise the backs of their cars is  that it's easier to go faster when you're always going  downhill.

 The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant.  If omitted in one place, they turn up in another.
 When a Bostonian "pahks" his "cah," the lost r's migrate  southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his  car and invest in  "erl wells."

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